The Many Mistakes Men Make in Bed


 
Today I’m gonna whine about people who do us no good in our lives and the importance of Dumping Them.
And yes the this has nothing to do with the title but it caught your attention didn’t it,you naughty little thing you!

I begin with how I’m always scared to lose friends good or bad because I used to have a belief that every single person that walks into my life brings something with them for me to hold on to or learn or grasp and I have to keep them there and accept who they are. Wrong.…I blame this entirely on cartoon network. No reason in particular I just have no one to pin this one on (never bullied, no sad childhood sob story, nothing pitiful about me blame it on)  so today we’re blaming a cartoon channel. Yup.  All those darn cartoons did this to me, they made me have unrealistic expectations on life …I kid.

Tanzanian kids we’re trained to withstand all sorts of people all sorts of things, from early age, the blackboard is small the teacher writes too fast so we write faster never ask for a new board we wouldn’t dare complain, The  teachers never ‘punish’ people who do us wrong no punishment for bullies u grow tough skin damnit this is Africa!   We’re just so darn nice! During a culture fest event sometime in college they used a smile/smiley to describe Tanzania, I found that rather amusing that even these guys realize darn we’re just too fuckin nice for own good (Pardon My french I'm off my meds). As a matter of fact, We are quite tolerant, very. we tolerate just about anything. We never feel the need to address shit. But you have to address shit. Here’s some shit of people you should not tolerate:

  1. The Narcissist Hitler-they will make you feel terrible about yourself because your friendship is about them . Me Me Me Me Me Me Me.
  2. The Drowner – These people will drown you right down when they’re drowning when you give them a hand to help them out, they’re problems become your headaches and they’re unhelpable since they don’t listen don’t take advice but just love to parade their problems. Pray for them, that’s all I can say. And run. Fast
  3. UNer-  They will feel like the devil when you kill a mosquito.  They will drive you around a the guilt trip with a Merc. DON’T. LOOK. BACK! 
  4. The Underminer -They make you feel less achieved in everything you do so you constantly are in a battle to impress them
  5. Your Clone- Copies everything you do, says everything you say, recycles your habits and opinions. These people need to find themselves…Stay Away. 
  6. The unreliable bat- This one is of no use to you howsoever but is just there. No goals no future plans lives to live and doesn't think of anything but fun. Thing is these people make you lose your sense of direction
  7.  Judas- constantly sells your secrets even if they ask you to forgive them trust me they will do it again. If you cant trust them, Stay away from them
  8. The  Nazis-  we all have a good little Nazi friend, rude and hostile to people they feel are inferior and disturbingly obedient and kiss-assy to people who they consider of higher status. Rigid opinions and beliefs, conventional, Ethnocentric  occupied to power and overly submissive to those of authority. Mass followers. You can use my jet ski to get away from this one. 
  9. The Grammatical Error- This one is serious, they correct your grammar ‘in public’  these are the people who reminded the teachers about assignments 5 minutes to ‘hometime’ lol, we do no befriend these people! They will seek out you’re every grammatical error if you know what I mean.
  10. The Abuser- Many people don’t know when they’re being abused, they only think of verbal abuse and violent abuse. But if someone constantly doesn't treat you well, vicious malicious comments but later says they were ‘kidding’ or makes you take it lightly while you were hurt with their treatment.  You’re being emotionally and verbally abused. Step by step.walk. 
  11. The Pessimist-  These people will wear you down with reasons why it is impossible they will tell you the glass is half empty. They will tell you the world is flat, they will tell you there is no God and they will give you 20 reasons why you shall fail and 20 more reasons why the world will end tomorrow and 50 reasons why 5 other random people will fail or die random freak deaths from falling coconuts at Cine Club. You do not need them in your life. They’re like plague, a cancer, once you start to believe them, you’re going down.  Say Hello, and Goodbye.to them. In.every.language.
  12. The Worshiper- Now I never had one of these glaldly but i've watched em, you need to be an achiever of some kind to have yourself a  set of worshiper friends, they will encourage all your bad traits, tell you are invincible, they will praise you and never criticize any wrong doings. To them you are perfect and they will treat you like it until you're so called perfection falls to pieces on society. The problem with the worshiper is when you fall, they will write a book and do interviews on how you tumbled. They will tell the world. Because they're intention all along was your presence and to watch you're Jesus to them. And they want to write a book. They're not your friends
You dont have to run and hide from these folks just keep reasonable distance, not much..something like say... the earth and sky.  

 But don’t cut people out of your life to isolate you and ‘walk alone’  , be it the right reason that they are making you unhappy and your happiness is at stake.  You have to learn to say NO.  That word will give you a lot of power, being nice is nice but put a fence around your garden some people come to pluck the flowers…But it is important to be nice, if these people have done things for you in your past, be thankful and remind them, reciprocate. and move on, you aren't obliged to spend every minute with them if being with them is not what you need. And most importantly, surround yourself with real people, people you wont have to struggle to put up with. 

And if someone’s behavior is affecting you, don’t just stay silent and move on not pick up their calls and ignore them. Confront them if you can and tell them why you two aren't it anymore. This sounds hard but look at the other side of the coin, them forever not knowing what they did wrong is really harsh and if this person was your friend they at least deserve that  from you. If you cant confront them, Give them less time. If they’re wise they will understand, if they aren't well, you could always kill them and hide the body ….lots of rivers in Dar Es Salaam, Kidding, I hear that’s illegal.

And remember when you’re cutting people out of your lives, please be it for the right reasons, if they’re troubled and need help, you can always try and if you cant help them, Pray for them, look for someone who can. You cant always be a hero.

However If you are in this category of people, be warned. You will lose a lot of friends along the way. One by One,we each have our own saturated levels of bullshit. The count to how long  till they give in for each of your friends... starts now.